Happy Birthday, F!

Today our beautiful little girl is one. :)

In some ways, it's hard to believe a whole year has past; it does seem like just a little while ago when we were taking that dark early Saturday morning drive to the hospital. And yet, a lot has happened; F has changed boatloads, and those days that seemed (and still seem) to linger on are too fresh in my mind to say that it went by "so fast." Whatever the time lapse has felt like, I find that I love her more and more each day. I love to watch her grow, learn new things, form attachments, have likes and dislikes, and do things on her own. I love how she loves going on walks, reading books every morning, playing with the mail, swinging, sliding down slides, singing, listening to music, animals, and people - especially little people like herself. I love how (almost) every morning she wakes up and I can hear her talking for a while by herself (one morning I opened the door and found her holding her cow facing her and was talking to it. melt.my.heart :). Then, when I go in she smiles, squeals and laughs, and holds up her arms for me to pick her up. I love it when she hugs me and rests her head on my shoulder or when she calls me ma-ma. :)

When I really sit down and think about the process of development she's gone through in the past year I am in awe. How does she grow so attached to me as a mother or Z as a father? What makes her trust or distrust people? What is going through her little brain that, at one point, didn't have a vocabulary? How do her bones and muscles grow so rapidly? Why does she get so excited when she sees dogs or ducks or leaves that crumble and crunch? And, how can a simple walk around the block be so intensely captivating?

I often think about these questions while I watch F play or when she gets really excited about something that to me is mundane. And, then I wonder, what has caused me to become bored with something that God so beautifully and amazingly designed and created? Have I become so acclimated or so callus to the my surroundings to the point where I no longer see the awesome things that God has made? Do I have the eyes of a child, being amazed at even the smallest details like the veins of a leaf or the feather or a bird?

I am so thankful to God for giving us such a precious gift, not only because she's adorable and an image bearer of God Himself, but because God uses her to point me to Him. She points me to Him because I am reminded how dependent on God I am to raise her. I can't do anything on my own for F, physically or spiritually. I must entrust her to the One who formed her, taking her (and my) needs to the throne of grace each and every day. I'm also reminded, by raising this child, to have that child-like excitement and wonder about what Christ has made and done and will do...even in the small things. My prayer for her is that she will grow up to confess Jesus Christ as her Savior and Lord, that God will use her to point many others to Himself, and that she will never lose that child-like excitement that leads to learning more about Jesus Christ and the world He has so marvelously made!

Happy Birthday, F! Mommy loves you and praises God for you!

41 Years

Proverbs 17:6: "Grandchildren are the crown of the aged, and the glory of children is their fathers."

Z and I were driving home the other day and saw someone pulled over to the side of the road. We questioned whether or not we should stop and see if they needed help; but, Z made the comment that they didn't have any hazard lights on or have their hood popped. It looked like they were probably pulling over for their kids. That got me thinking how I kind of wish I didn't have some memories - like pulling over on the side of the road and my dad holding me up to go to the bathroom when I was 5 or 6. How embarrassing. But, it does make me smile. And, it makes me think of other memories I have from childhood. Like, every Sunday morning my dad helping me put on my shoes, or my mother teaching me how to read (I thought I was oh-so sneaky when I'd flip to the next page when she wasn't looking and memorize the first 3-5 words. Then when she'd come back to listen to me read I'd struggle through, as usual, the page we were on, turn the page, and read ever so perfectly that first line. My mom would smile down at me and say she was so impressed. Thanks, Mom, I thought so. :).

Later in life, they guided me through the more difficult channels of puberty, college, marriage, and having children. They've prayed for me, talked with me, helped me, warned me, and encouraged me. And, more than potty training me, teaching me to read, or guiding me through college and relationships, my parents taught me about grace. God used them to show me my sin, my need for Jesus Christ, and that my only hope for salvation is through Him. And, they're still teaching me these things in my adult life. Even after all of their children have left home, they continue to be faithful to God who has so graciously been faithful to them. And, they truly are the glory of their children, like Proverbs 17:6 says.

Today marks my parents' 41st anniversary. Happy Anniversary, Mother and Daddy! I love you.

Living Life

Whew. Life has been busy. But, I like to say that it's better to be busy then bored (someone probably said that before me...but, I don't know who :). We've been busy with church activities, school, and chasing Felicity around the house. Here are just a few things that have kept us running...

Last weekend was the church workday and Fall Ministry Project. My sister, Anna, and her husband, Dan, brought up a FMP team of 4 boys and 4 girls. I was stoked to find that my sister was coming here with a group. I had high hopes that she and Dan could stay at our house (we had previously agreed to host some folks), but we ended up with the boys. But, that was cool. We actually ended up having the whole team for dinner and games Saturday evening which was a lot of fun for us. I absolutely LOVE it when people come to our house. Makes. My. Day. :) Monday morning when I went downstairs where the boys were all staying, I was so surprised to find everything in it's place. They so kindly stripped their beds, put the bedding away, and folded up all the blankets. I guess having guys instead of girls isn't too bad after all. :)

Sunday we went to the Life Chain following fellowship lunch. And, after leaving there went down to SecondRP for evening worship. One thing I learned about this church: they have an amazing sound system for their nursery. You could hear every word. And, it was really great see so many friends and family. The car ride also gave Z and me some time to talk and pray since we hadn't gotten much of the that the last couple of days.

This past week we went door to door to (mostly) neighbors we've met before to invite them to an investigative Bible study that we're hosting at our house as part of one of our church's small groups. And, I must say, I was surprised with how many neighbors invited us to sit and talk or show us their house. Two of these houses I walk by nearly every day and wonder what the inside is like, and we got to enter them. Score. :) And, while only one person came, it was quite nice to get to know our neighbors. We spent two to three hours talking with 8 of our neighbors. It was great! I told Z we should just go door-to-door every night. :) We are hopeful and praying (please pray with us!) that more people (especially non-believers) will come to the Bible study in the coming weeks, but we're also thankful the opportunity we had to get to know our neighbors better.

F is getting into more and more stuff. We can't complain. We're glad she's growing. She's not quite walking, but she is gingerly making her way around furniture. She doesn't seem to quite have enough courage to move more quickly along furniture, even though I think she could. I'm hoping she doesn't start walking until after her first birthday because Z and I made a "bet." He thinks she will and I think she won't. Whoever gets it right gets to pick where our date night will be in November. :) Despite not walking, she definitely gets to wherever she wants. She's also into opening cabinet doors and taking out all the contents. The other day when I was in the other room folding laundry she was in the kitchen spilling oats all over the floor. She's also fascinated with the toilet handle. We try to keep the door closed, but if it's ever left open, you'll know where to find her. In other news, I calculated last week how many calories she's been getting every day: 800, give or take a few. This week she seems to be eating even more, though. I think it helps that she now has 6 teeth to chew her food! We're so glad to be done with teething...at least for the moment. Those last four sure were character building for mommy and F. :) 

And, tonight we're enjoying homemade white hot chocolate (definitely another Pinterest win. yum! :) while Z grades and I work on laundry and think about school for next week...oh, and write this. So, I better go get back to work.  :)

A Memory From Last Fall

Today has reminded me so much of last year's weather. Rainy and chilly. Not only has it made me recall the weather but also some funny memories. I thought I'd share one in particular. I hope you get as much of a laugh at it as I do. :)

 I wrote the following account last year on October 19th, just 10 days before going into labor with little F.

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We've almost finished the baby room's floor (yes, it's taken us forever and a day...but we're near the end :). Last Saturday Z was able to Polyurethane the floor. So, my job this week has been to sand the old base boards and repaint them. I got them well sanded yesterday and did the first coat of paint this morning. I figured since I already had the paint trays/brushes out I might as well work on the trim and the doorway to match. :) I wiped down on the walls and trim that were still covered with dust from sanding down the floors and took off the door handle. I grabbed my paint roller, brush, and tray, and decided to start on the doorway first. I know a good painter would actually take the door off and paint it but, who has time for that?! I started on the backside (inside of the baby room) of the door but wasn't able to quite get in the corner, so I shut the door. It was then that I realized I had just locked myself inside the room. I tried to grapple the inside of the door knob with my fingers, but it proved to be pointless. My first thought was, "Oh no! I have to be at SCA today..." I had no phone and no way of knowing what time of day it was. I just knew it was close to lunch time because I was hungry...and boy, was that commode calling my name, too. I sat there for awhile wondering what do. I had two options: wait for Z to get home or climb out the window and either contact a neighbor or walk to the church.

I chose the latter. I climbed/jumped out of the window (the window sits about 5 feet from the ground outside, so not too bad). But, none of the neighbors that I know well enough to go ask for help from were home. All of the windows and doors to our house were locked. The one spare key we had had outside was in my purse (inside :) because I had used it last week when I couldn't find my keys, and I obviously failed to put it back outside since then. So, I stood on the porch and considered whether I should go make a new friend by meeting a new neighbor to see if they knew how to pick a lock (there are these guys redoing the house catty-corner to us, and I figured surely they would know how to pick a lock)- or if I could at least use their phone to call the church and tell them that I wouldn't be able to make it to class. Instead, though, I decided to just walk to the church. My lesson plans consisted of the students doing peer reviews with their rough drafts. So, while I wasn't dressed for the occasion, I could at least go and tell them my predicament and get someone to possibly cover for me or see if they would let me teach with shorts (shorts are a pretty strict no-no at SCA).

I set out with my head up and smiling. Honestly, I couldn't help but laugh at myself, so the smile came naturally. But, I decided to hold my head up that way people wouldn't stop to ask if I needed help. In the rainy, 40-50 degree weather I had on shorts, an over-sized, paint covered, holey, red, "JC Penney's Biggest Sale of the Year" t-shirt, with black socks and slippers (thankfully my slippers have rubber bottoms...though, I found out that there are holes in those too). I thought about taking off the slippers before jumping out the window, but in the end I was thankful I didn't. :)  I knew I looked 9 months pregnant and homeless. I realized that I missed the "Walk a Mile in My Shoes" walk-a-thon to help the homeless several months back - this was my best attempt to make up for missing the event. The 2.4ish mile trek went quite nicely, actually. I was thankful that it was rainy - that meant that no one was outside to comment on my appearance (normally I get several comments on my preggo-ness on my walks around town). I did have one lady who stopped while going through downtown. She asked if I was okay or needed anything. I told her I was fine...just locked myself out of my house while painting. She, apparently, had seen me earlier in the day as well, so she knew I had been walking for awhile. I told her I was almost to my destination. The only other comment I got was from a couple of teenage boys who were like, "Dude! What are you thinkin'?! Shorts?! Man, I gotta have my hoodie!" By that point my fingers and toes were numb, but I didn't know what to say, and they were obviously slowing down for an answer. So, I just replied with a chuckle, "Well, I have an interior heater," pointing to the kiddo as I waddled past them (and by that point I was truly waddling).

When I finally got to the church I was quite the site. My slippers and socks were soaking wet. My hair, which had been straightened, was now curly, and my arms/hands were purple. Thankfully everybody was in class or study hall, so I was able to escape from all the questions. I went to office (after I visited the commode, of course) and Mrs. C. and Sidney couldn't stop laughing when they saw me. I couldn't either. I laughed so much I started crying. I asked her what she thought I should do - I had one hour before my class was suppose to start. Then Mr. D., who was at the church working on some repairs, walked in and offered to help. I told him I didn't know what he could do unless he could pick a lock...then he suggested going back in through the window and taking the hinges off the door. I hadn't thought of that. :) So, Mr. D. volunteered to drive me back home and help me get back in the house. I told Mrs. C. I was hopeful to be back within the hour, but if I wasn't, Sid was willing to sit in for me with the kids.

Mr. D. quickly got a few tools together and a small ladder, and we were off. When we got to our house I showed Mr. D. around back to the unlocked window. He set up his ladder and had a little bit of trouble getting the window to open. But, we finally got it up, and he started to climb in. When he got about half way in, however, there was a big bang that echoed in the empty room. The window that was up had fallen on the floor inside. Mr. D.'s feet were pretty much dangling out the window (barely touching the ladder anymore) and his other half was leaning awkwardly inside. My heart stopped beating for a minute, and I thought we'd for sure lost Mr. D., for sure. When I saw him lay across the window motionless, and when he didn't respond to my frantic, "Mr. D?! Are you okay?!" the only thing I could think was "Mr. D. is dead!" I should have remembered that Mr. D. just always takes a little longer to respond. He finally lifted himself up a bit and said, "Oh...my head'll heal. I just wanted to make sure the glass didn't break." Apparently, while leaning over the window sill, he was just examining things (I have to admit, I was thinking about this last night when I couldn't sleep...it gave me a good chuckle to remember this scene of life). The  bottom window had somehow become detached and fallen off. The window frame was chipped a wee bit, but he thought it would be easily glued back together (he later tried to explain to me how to do it and what to use...but, my brain was fried already. I figured if Z didn't know what to do, we could just ask Mr. D at church). He got a better foot grip on the ladder and was able to get in and use his screwdriver as a door handle. I was sooo glad when we didn't have to take the hinges off my door and possibly mess up my paint job!

Mr. D. left with his tools and headed back to the church, and I scrambled to get dressed, get some of my books/grades/papers together for class, and sloppily put together a sandwich. I was quite famished. I also was able to talk to Z for a few minutes in here. After I told him briefly about my days unexpected schedule of events he suggested that we hide 10 keys outside. :) Well, then I bundled up, grabbed my purse, locked the front door from the inside, and slammed the door behind me as I walked out. Then I realized my car wasn't in the driveway. Z had taken it to work because his car has been leaking oil and doesn't want to take it too far without having it checked out first. Well, with my car keys are also my house keys. I thought, for a moment, I'd locked myself out again. Then I remembered the spare key in my purse that I hadn't ever put back in place. :) So, I ran around and went through the back door and hopped in Z's car. I pushed the garage door opener while eating my ham  sandwich, but when I looked up the door wasn't up. I thought for a minute that maybe I didn't push the button (I figure my mind has obviously been in la-la land all day, so it'd be easy to forget whether or not I pushed a button), so I pushed it again. I started the car and found again that the door still wasn't up. I tried to push it again and this time watched as the door started to open and stopped after two seconds. Of all the things to go wrong. I recalled trying to open the garage door from the outside earlier in the day when I was checking all the windows and doors (just to see if it would open :) and, apparently, I had detached it from the automated system. Not only had I managed to lock myself out of the house, but now I had also locked the car inside the garage.

I called Mrs. C. to tell her that I wouldn't be able to make it and to just have Sidney fill in for me...but, then she said she would send Mr. C. to come get me. Another person to rescue me. :) I did make it to class. By the time I got out of class everyone and their brother had heard what had happened and wanted me to tell the story. I felt quite popular. I'm glad everyone got a good laugh out of it. Then the C.'s offered to drive me home instead of waiting at the library for Z...I thought that was pretty nice of them, too.

I'm pretty sure that this kiddo (my interior heater :) wants to jump out and join the excitement after my little adventure.

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Women's Retreat Audio

Earlier I shared about being at the women's retreat last week, so I thought I'd link to the sermon audio for some of the talks.

These really are worth listening to.

"With Him: Jesus' Passion for Discipleship"

"Go Therefore: Jesus' Vision for Discipleship"